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Thoughts on how to market a product with strict policies

Hello oh Wise Ones, :D I really need your help and suggestions here. I just became an affiliate of a product that has VERY strict policies. I won't mention the product here. I pulled out of the terms and conditions only the policies that affect the marketing of said product. I've read this more than a dozen times and I keep coming up with "how do they expect me to market their product when I can't post it anywhere?" If you have any suggestions, I would REALLY appreciate it.

Affiliates are forbidden to run ads on Google Adwords (or any Google property) under any and all circumstances. Google is not allowed regardless of intended use of specific keywords. NO GOOGLE.

Affiliates must also NEVER use any images or videos that they do not own (including the (product name) sales video(s)

Affiliates are forbidden from creating webpages, social media pages or accounts that falsely represent themselves as the creators or owners of the (product name) product and must make it clear that the page is a REVIEW page and you're being compensated for the review. Therefore, any page and all creative contained therein must include the word 'REVIEW' in the title, the url and any graphics used in the cover image or profile image. This includes blogs, webpages, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube or ANY OTHER online entity whether or not it is considered to be "social media".

NOTE: I get the "falsely represent themselves as the creators or owners" but my landing page is NOT a review and I hesitate to say that it is.

Affiliates are not allowed to publish or distribute Press Releases about (the product) in any way, shape, or form on any press release platform, website, in printed media, or on any other press release service.

You are not allowed to promote (the product) on retail sites, auction sites, or app stores such as Amazon, eBay, Google Store, iTunes, or any other site that falls into these categories, in any way, shape, or form (this includes products created by you or by us). As well, selling products branded with the (product name) brand on Craigslist, Kijiji, or any other classified ad network is forbidden.

I hope you know that when I called you "oh Wise Ones" I meant that lovingly, right? I was NOT trying to be snotty. I respect your expertise and experience. And I need your help! :)

I'm open to any and all suggestions. Work your magic, people. :D Thank you in advance.
 
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I thought about doing a newsletter to promote these products, but it will take a long time to obtain a opt-in list and I don't think it's going to work anyway. I'm really at a loss.
 
Sounds like they want free publicity and branding from you ... They can buy their own traffic and do whatever the hell they want ... I see this a lot and usually I just shine it on --find someone more accommodating.
 
Why don't you find another Offer to promote, if you can make the grade with such strict requirements, I believe you can make more profit by promoting other Offers.
 
These policies really limit your chances. Even if you have a way to promote it, you'll only have one source of traffic, leaving you with limited chances to get conversions. Trying other offers maybe the best course of action here.
 
Consider researching alternate advertising avenues to get over your affiliate program's restrictive restrictions, which limit Google Adwords use and require unambiguous representation of your material as a review. Pay attention to social media advertising and platforms such as Bing Ads that correspond with your intended audience. Make the necessary changes to your landing page to include review-style content, making sure to identify it as such. Provide unique photos for your marketing collateral while adhering to their no-use-of-unowned-images policy. Experiment with email marketing, influencer partnerships, or affiliate marketing through specialized websites that don't adhere to the rules to broaden your promotional channels. Focus on establishing connections with bloggers or influencers to obtain real product reviews rather than relying just on conventional press releases.

While large retail and auction sites are prohibited, you might want to think about starting your website or using more specialized, smaller platforms as long as they don't violate the terms of the affiliate program. Sustain adherence to these standards to cultivate a favorable rapport with the affiliate program. If you have any questions concerning your landing page, contact the affiliate program's support staff for an explanation.
 
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