From the 5 Star Blog (Friday Funnies)
You Might Be Addicted To Affiliate Marketing If?
I had a serious case of Internet withdrawal while I was at the Affiliate Summit in Vegas. I didn't take a notebook and swore I would stay offline the entire time - my carpal needed a break. I made it - but had a serious jones every time I thought about all the forums I could not read and all the fights and flames I was missing. (kidding!) My hands would sweat when I thought about the 100's of juicy SPAM emails I would get to delete when I got home. My feet swelled up and hurt even worse every time I thought about how badly I am addicted to sitting on my butt 12 hours a day in front of the computer. Every time we walked past the Internet Kiosk at the hotel, several people had to hold me back. I was screaming "I just need to touch a keyboard, stroke a mouse, please just let me check my email or peak at one forum so I feel better." I needed a fix - bad!
The most serious sign of Affiliate Marketing Addiction however was realizing how many social skills I had lost with the progression of my dis-ease. Remember names? Put names and faces together? Talk to real people instead of typing to them? How do you do that??? When I was talking my fingers would twitch - itching to IM out of habit. Once someone at the convention could not hear my last comment and asked me what I just said - I replied "SCROLL UP."
So for today's post I thought I would share some red flags that may signal you too have a problem and may be Addicted to Affiliate Marketing.
You Might Be Addicted To Affiliate Marketing If?
* someone tells you about a great new program and you're disappointed to find it's a TV program.
* your mouse has more miles on it than your car.
* you think a night out on the town is drinking a beer while hanging out with the gang at your favorite affiliate forum.
* the guy on the TV news says there is a merger rumor between 2 of the major networks and you think of CJ & Linkshare instead of Fox and NBC.
* you need to lose a few pounds so you start making yourself exercise in front of the computer. You do 5 leg lifts every time you make a sale, 5 sit ups every time you check your stats and 5 crunches every time one of the networks goes down. Your stomach hurts like hell, but your legs need more of a workout.
* you go to Affiliate Summit and ask why people have traditional name tags instead of having their forum nick names imprinted on geeky propeller caps so it?s easier to find the people you know by their screen names. (I did)
* you go to Affiliate Summit and ask Shawn Collins if he is really your Mom. (Inside joke)
If you think you may have a serious problem and live in the LA area, I have a solution. I plan to start having LA/OC 12 Step Meetings for those who are afflicted with this uncontrollable disease. Stay tuned to the 5 Star Channel for information about our 1st SoCal event for affiliates and managers that suffer from this terrible addiction. You need not suffer alone in silence - we can all suffer together over a few beers! I can't guarantee I can help you stop your addictive behavior, but maybe by sharing our stories we can all learn to be better addicts, err? I mean, Affiliate Marketers!
Note: This edition of the Friday Funnies is sponsored in part by ?LA/OC Affiliate Addicts Anonymous.? If you are interested in meetings or just need to talk to someone who understands, call us at (800) StopLinking
------------
On a more serious note - we are planning LA/OC affiliate events.
Stay tuned for more...
Ok I spilled my guts, now you spill! If you won't admit your addiction we all know you are just in denial!
What are some of the signs that make you think you are addicted too?
You Might Be Addicted To Affiliate Marketing If?
I had a serious case of Internet withdrawal while I was at the Affiliate Summit in Vegas. I didn't take a notebook and swore I would stay offline the entire time - my carpal needed a break. I made it - but had a serious jones every time I thought about all the forums I could not read and all the fights and flames I was missing. (kidding!) My hands would sweat when I thought about the 100's of juicy SPAM emails I would get to delete when I got home. My feet swelled up and hurt even worse every time I thought about how badly I am addicted to sitting on my butt 12 hours a day in front of the computer. Every time we walked past the Internet Kiosk at the hotel, several people had to hold me back. I was screaming "I just need to touch a keyboard, stroke a mouse, please just let me check my email or peak at one forum so I feel better." I needed a fix - bad!
The most serious sign of Affiliate Marketing Addiction however was realizing how many social skills I had lost with the progression of my dis-ease. Remember names? Put names and faces together? Talk to real people instead of typing to them? How do you do that??? When I was talking my fingers would twitch - itching to IM out of habit. Once someone at the convention could not hear my last comment and asked me what I just said - I replied "SCROLL UP."
So for today's post I thought I would share some red flags that may signal you too have a problem and may be Addicted to Affiliate Marketing.
You Might Be Addicted To Affiliate Marketing If?
* someone tells you about a great new program and you're disappointed to find it's a TV program.
* your mouse has more miles on it than your car.
* you think a night out on the town is drinking a beer while hanging out with the gang at your favorite affiliate forum.
* the guy on the TV news says there is a merger rumor between 2 of the major networks and you think of CJ & Linkshare instead of Fox and NBC.
* you need to lose a few pounds so you start making yourself exercise in front of the computer. You do 5 leg lifts every time you make a sale, 5 sit ups every time you check your stats and 5 crunches every time one of the networks goes down. Your stomach hurts like hell, but your legs need more of a workout.
* you go to Affiliate Summit and ask why people have traditional name tags instead of having their forum nick names imprinted on geeky propeller caps so it?s easier to find the people you know by their screen names. (I did)
* you go to Affiliate Summit and ask Shawn Collins if he is really your Mom. (Inside joke)
If you think you may have a serious problem and live in the LA area, I have a solution. I plan to start having LA/OC 12 Step Meetings for those who are afflicted with this uncontrollable disease. Stay tuned to the 5 Star Channel for information about our 1st SoCal event for affiliates and managers that suffer from this terrible addiction. You need not suffer alone in silence - we can all suffer together over a few beers! I can't guarantee I can help you stop your addictive behavior, but maybe by sharing our stories we can all learn to be better addicts, err? I mean, Affiliate Marketers!
Note: This edition of the Friday Funnies is sponsored in part by ?LA/OC Affiliate Addicts Anonymous.? If you are interested in meetings or just need to talk to someone who understands, call us at (800) StopLinking
------------
On a more serious note - we are planning LA/OC affiliate events.
Ok I spilled my guts, now you spill! If you won't admit your addiction we all know you are just in denial!
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